Before going into the story I would like to explain something first. I feel very out of place in a world where it seems the thing to do (at least in the area I live) is to have a natural birth where you wait to go into labor when the baby is ready and have the baby without pain medicine and with as little intervention as possible. This was my hope with my son David but as I was over 41 weeks pregnant and the doctors, due to other issues as well as being late, decided to induce me and I had a wonderful experience with his labor despite having to get an epidural. However, due to complications of him being late he had to spend some time in the NICU. I was so thankful that the doctors were able to induce me and get him out before the complications had much more time to develop so that his NICU stay was only an hour or so while they gave him extra help rather than him needing to stay longer or something having happened to him if I waited to go naturally. However, when telling friends about my labor with David I almost felt guilty, or like I somehow failed his labor for being induced, even though it was the best thing to do and I am glad I did it. I found myself feeling the need to justify to others why the doctors thought it best and why I decided to follow their advice. This has greatly bothered me and with Aylah I did a lot of reading about hypnobirthing and hoped and prayed I would go into labor naturally and be able to labor at home for a good while before heading into the hospital for the "perfect" birth experience I felt others were telling me I was suppose to have. It was with that frame of mind that I entered the final weeks of my pregnancy and that is where this story will begin.
Cory and I talked about how long we wanted to wait before being induced in the event that I went over again and decided we wanted to hit 41 weeks before induction. We waited until our 39 week appointment (on a Friday) to discuss it with a doctor because we were being seen by the doctor in the practice who was our favorite and does not like inducing but greatly favors waiting and letting them come when they are ready. Our plan was to discuss this with him after the check up when he asked if we had any questions. After he checked me and the baby he discussed the concerns that he had and asked about my previous induction with David. I gave him the details he wanted and he let out a big sigh before saying how he did not like inductions but felt I needed one as soon as I could get in next week due to a few things that were going on (if you want more details I can share them a bit more personally than the blog). I asked about waiting until the following Friday instead to give her a bit more time to come on her own and he said that he would not recommend waiting but if we had to wait there were a few extra things we needed to be watching for and then go straight to labor and delivery if any showed up. We decided to talk about what we wanted to do and then call labor and delivery to set up an appointment for the day we chose.
Cory and I had a huge discussion (that's probably pretty obvious though) on what to do. On the one hand we wanted to wait until we knew she was ready but on the other hand David had complications because of how late he was. We also were concerned for the items that the doctor brought up and his feeling of urgency for an induction. We decided in the end that of all the doctors in the practice he really was the one we trusted most who was against intervention unless he felt it best for the baby and/or mother's health and that we would go ahead and continue to trust him and get induced on Monday. I called and set up the appointment.
Despite all our hopes and prayers that she would come on her own that weekend (which was the doctors hope as well as he was on call that weekend and was hoping to deliver her) she did not. Monday morning came and we got the call at 5:45 to be at the hospital as soon as possible. We arrived at 6ish leaving David with Grandma and Grandpa Mills as they live only a few hours away and were planning on coming down to watch him when/if I went into labor on my own. When we arrived one of my first questions was which doctor was on call. By chance with David we got the doctor I was hoping for but this time my least favorite doctor was on call. I had successfully avoided him through the whole pregnancy and was really bummed that he was the one that would deliver my daughter.
I was started on the Pitocin at 7 and Cory and I began the day by playing bananagrams! At about 8 I couldn't focus on the game anymore and the nurse was saying how that was a great sign. By 8:30 I was using my hypnobirthing relaxing techniques for each wave (they don't like to use the word contraction with hypnobirthing so we used wave instead). I feel most relaxed when laying and watching a movie so we put on Megamind and I continued to relax. The doctor broke my water at 10:30 am hoping that it would help speed things along and the waves really picked up at that point. I found that as long as I continued to relax I did fine through them but it was beginning to take more of my concentration and I was beginning to need Cory's help as well. (Which he was a fantastic help and 100% there for me the whole time)
I was given a fantastic nurse for the day and she was completely supportive of my desire to go natural (Other than the Pitocin of course). She was extremely encouraging and was constantly telling me how great I was doing and how amazed she was that I was in this much control still. She also commented on how hard it is to labor on Pitocin, especially without an epidural and was so impressed with how well I was doing. (I kept thinking Thank You Hypnobirthing!)
At 1 pm I was still hanging in there. The waves had become intense but with each one I did my relaxing and visualizing and was able to stay in control. Then the woman came. A lady entered the room and asked if she could have a few minutes. She then started explaining how they were doing a study and wanted me to participate in it. She went on about how great the study was and how it would help the future while I was trying to relax through waves and wanted her to hurry up so that I knew what she actually wanted to do to me and my baby. She finally got to that part and it was simply to use a different computer in addition to the one they were currently using. As a thank you for participating they were giving a large box of Huggies diapers which contained enough to last about a month. She left the room for us to discuss it but the problem was that during her whole 20-30 minute visit (she had to stop talking every 2-3 minutes for 1 minute during the waves so it really stretched out the conversation) I had become tense and was trying to focus on making the good decision and understanding what she was talking about instead of relaxing. Cory and I tried to talk but I was losing control of the waves and they started to become really painful as I wasn't relaxing enough. I finally told Cory to just tell her no and help me get relaxed again. He told her and came back to help me.
Just as I began to feel like I might be able to get back in control of the pain the nurse came in. My nurse really was absolutely amazing and this is the only problem/complaint I had with her. During the middle of wave (I had my eyes closed) she began to lower my bed to check my blood pressure. I had not been expecting the bed to suddenly move and I jumped causing my entire body to tense and as soon as that happened I felt the most intense physical pain I recall ever feeling in my life. With my body tense it was fighting against what the contractions were trying to do and I hurt! I spent the next 45 minutes trying to relax but I couldn't convince my mind that the extreme pain was not going to come back with each wave so I kept tensing with each one. They grew steadily worse until I was shaking and crying involuntarily with each one. I couldn't look at Cory because I knew he would be able to see the pain I was in through my eyes and I didn't want to scare him. The nurse came in and checked me but my labor seemed to have stalled as I had progressed very little in the last 2 hours. At that point I decided that I didn't want to go natural anymore if this was what I was going to feel (because of not being able to relax and get back in control) for the next who knows how many hours and I asked for an epidural.
My nurse continued to be kind and supportive and mentioned multiple times how much harder contractions are when they are caused by Pitocin rather than going into labor on your own and that I should be proud of what I was able to do. I received the epidural around 2:30ish so I went about 7 1/2 hours on Pitocin without it. I was glad for her support and especially glad for the help I was able to get. The epidural had a button that let me control how much medicine I received so I was able to keep it at a point where I could still feel the waves and relax through them without losing control. I was able to calm down and was really frustrated that the lady came in to talk to us about the study as I felt that was what threw me off and if she hadn't come in I would have been able to keep going without any problems. Then I had the thought, "I WANT THOSE DIAPERS! I lost my pain free hynobirth to my baby girl because of that study so I want to get everything I can out of it!" I sent Cory to find the lady and she returned 20 minutes later to add the additional computer and bring me my huge box of size 1 diapers.
I sent Cory to get some lunch from the cafeteria about 3:30. I was checked at that point and had again had no change in my progress. I was so glad that I had relief from that intense pain so that I did not have to hear that I put up with it for another hour without any change. The nurse recommended I try and sleep as I was complete exhausted. I was not expecting the emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion that would come from the constant focus on staying relaxed and breathing through the waves. I fell asleep about 4 pm but was awakened when Cory came in at 4:15. At 4:30 I suddenly felt like it was time to push. I remembered feeling that with David and calling the nurse but my nurse this time said she was going to check on me about 4:30 so I decided to wait until she came in. She must have thought I was sleeping because she didn't come till 5. When I told her I felt like pushing she said, "How exciting! You should have called me sooner so we could check!" She did a quick check and sure enough we were ready to go. She left to get the doctor.
She came back into the room about 10 after 5 and said that unfortunatly the doctor was in a c-section so they had to call in a different doctor from the practice to deliver the baby and he would be here in about 5 minutes. Who was the doctor that was coming? My favorite doctor who had sent us in to get the induction! I was beyond thrilled that he would be doing the delivery! He arrived and said how excited he was that they called him over to delivery me! (Keep in mind he had been on call all weekend delivering babies, just worked a full day at the office and was called over right when he should have been heading home. He really is a great doctor!) After letting me do 1/8th of a push before stopping me (I pushed for just under 3 hours with David before he was born so they wanted to make sure she was really ready) he got ready to deliver her and on my second push Princess Unicorn was born at 5:32 pm. She weighed in at 8 lbs 14 oz and was 21 inches long. Everyone commented on the large amount of dark hair she had! She was perfect and healthy as can be without any NICU time needed. She nursed right away and we were able to do skin to skin. (Both of which I wasn't able to do with Spiderman until hours later because of his complications) It was an amazing experience!
Spiderman came to meet Princess Unicorn the next day and our family was complete. He took to her right away and even understood that it was the same Princess Unicorn that had been growing in mommy's tummy. We were so thrilled to be all together at last.
Through this experience I have learned how even more grateful I am for modern medicine and the wisdom of my doctor. While I would have loved to go into labor on my own and had the epidural free hypnobirth I am more thankful that the the doctors were able to bring me both of my children through induction so that Spiderman and Princess Unicorn could both be here safe and sound. I am so glad that my doctor was able to recognize Princes Unicorn was ready to come and to help us get her here safe.
The first day we met Spiderman's group leaders and watched the opening show with skits put on by the staff. It was the strangest thing to be watching the skits without being in any of them! Spiderman played on the grass at Aspen lawn and loved to climb on the stone turtles, bears, ram and cougar. It took us at least an hour to coax him to walk all the way to our cabin with us as there was so many new things to see.
The second day we took Spiderman to class and headed to the guest lecture on the restoration of the gospel. It was wonderful! Then we picked up Spiderman and played at one of the playgrounds until lunch. After lunch we took Spiderman back to his class (the Rompers) for nap time and we headed to arts and crafts where I picked out special ceramic painting projects I could make for each of the kids. I choose a unicorn for Princess Unicorn and a turtle for Spiderman. Cory spent time working on a Celtic pattern he wanted to press onto leather. Then we had dinner and headed to frontier night! This is an evening where the staff dress up as cowboys and Indians and run a fun western town full of games and activities. It was a blast! Spiderman had a great time trying all the games, picking beads for his leather branded necklace and even was given a huge piece of watermelon that he munched on the whole way back to the cabin until it was devoured. 
On Sunday we ate breakfast and headed to church which is always magical sitting in the outdoor amphitheater surrounded by trees and wildlife. Spiderman was wearing yellow monkey boots and a green sunhat with his church cloths. A boy walked by him and started yelling "Look mom! Its a leprechaun!" over and over until his mom finally said that it was. We took Spiderman to nursery but I missed him so much (as a stay at home mom I am used to being with him all the time) so I went and hung out in nursery too for the last hour. Then we ate lunch during which Spiderman fell asleep in his high chair! We went back to the cabin to let him and Princess Unicorn sleep and then went down to the pond so that Spiderman could throw rocks in the water which he really enjoyed. Next we went to some grass and let him play a while. Then we had dinner and headed to the cabin to put the kids to bed. Over all it was a very peaceful day.
